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Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Baby Confession

So as I've posted a few times before that Trey and I are preparing our home (namely, my diabetic body) for pregnancy.  I am incredibly excited to be a mom someday and hold my own little son or daughter. 

But.

I have a baby confession I need to make.  When it comes to babies that I consider "mine" (like my nephews), I have no problem holding them and playing with them or their projectile fluids.  But when it's other people's kids, I have this sort of hands-off approach where I'm standing at arms length saying "Awww, how cute!"  I know babies are just little balls of spewing bodily fluids ready to blow at any time, like a volcano--it's a scientific fact.  And I have this issue with having other people's snot, puke, or poop on me.  (I guess I'm weird.)  So when I'm holding someone else's baby through some random pass around, I don't sit there thinking how cute they are.  I keep looking for the signs of an eruption in their facial expressions.  Such was the case the other day at work. 

One of the ladies in our office just had her 3rd daughter (!) and brought her into the office to show off.  I heard all the cooing coming from the hallway, so I walked into her office to see the little angel (at arms length).  But before I knew it, I was handed the 2-month-old infant with a "You wanna hold her?"  Well, I guess so.  (I suppose there's some general assumption that all women old enough to procreate are able to hold babies.  I'd like to start a campaign to squash this assumption.  Who's with me?) "Sure, I'll hold it."  IT!  I called this woman's daughter an "it" like my 2 neutered dogs.  *slaps face* 

So I'm holding this infant, carefully watching her expressions to see if my white sweater was about to become a neutral shade of puke, then she smiled.  Whoa!  Not even with my nephews have I ever held an infant and they smiled in my arms.  For a moment, I forgot my fear of handling other people's DNA and enjoyed holding her.  She opened her eyes for me and I said, "Hi!"  And she gave me this look like, "Wait a minute!  You're not my mommy!", then she started to squirm.  And I gave her back to her mom. 

Everyone has told me, "It's different when it's your own kid."  I sure hope so, because I need to be comfortable with a little ball of flesh oozing bodily fluids from all entries.  But at least half of the fluids will be coming from me.  How beautiful! 

5 comments:

  1. I am with you. I'm at the point now where holding babies tends to get the reaction, "Ooooh, you're a natural!", or "Looks like someone's got the baby bug!" (Sidenote: what the heck is a "baby bug"? Sounds gross.) It drives me nuts.

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  2. Trust me, it is completely different when it's your own (even for my husband). My 3 month old is proof of this. :)

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  3. Other People's DNA is the name of my Naughty By Nature cover band.

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  4. I am the same way...when it comes to my nephews..then as pukey, snotty babies and now as dirty, snotty, little boys...I loved them all the same and thought nothing of it. But other people's kids I like to enjoy at arm's length too. I have heard it is different with your own kids though! And evidenced by your willingness to deal with your nephews bodily fluids, you will do just fine when you and your hubby have a baby!

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  5. This post made me LOL. I am not a fan of anything that erupts from the nose and, regardless of the source of origin, it makes me sick to my stomach. BSparl was no exception - her boogies grossed me right out. Thankfully, they didn't gross my husband out, so when the baby was playing host to NastyTown, he took care of business.

    Poop diapers, on the other hand, are all mine. :p

    You are going to be a wonderful mom.

    ReplyDelete

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DISCLAIMER: I am not a doctor, nurse, certified diabetes educator (CDE) or any medical professional of any kind. (But I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express!) Therefore, please do not use any of my postings as medical fact. I am simply a blogger expressing my highs and lows (pun intended) with diabetes. For changes in your medication, exercise regiment, or diet please consult a qualified physician.

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My name is Holly and I live in north Alabama with my hubby, two cats, and a dog.