Don't be Afraid to Pee

Well, this post is by far the most embarrassing post I've ever written.  It seems that everything is on high alert with a diabetic pregnancy, or maybe just in my mind.  But the two questions my OB always asks me at my appointments are "Any bleeding?" and "Any loss of fluid?"  I didn't really understand what "loss of fluid" was, so I asked a nurse to clarify.  "Oh, it will feel like you peed yourself."  Lovely.  So be prepared for an extremely TMI post. 

This past Sunday, I was sitting in church and listening to the sermon, which was titled "Do Not be Afraid".  We're currently doing a sermon series on trusting God and not being afraid of death, rejection, etc.  When we stood up to sing the last song, I felt this "gush" of liquid.  I turned to Trey and said, "I'm going to the bathroom".  I'm sure he thought I was doing the typical pregnancy thing of going to the bathroom every hour or something.  

In the bathroom, I checked but couldn't tell if anything was wrong.  I called the on-call doctor as soon as we got out, and he said it might be urine but said to keep an eye on it for the rest of the day.  If it was my water leaking, it would be continuous and not one time.  Having my water break this early is a scary thing because it means my baby would have to be delivered within 24 hours, not OK with me!  So I cautiously went about my day, cleaning the house for a Super Bowl party.  I also laid down for a nap later, and still no more "gushing", thankfully.  

I called my doctor's office the next day (yesterday) to see if he confirmed the on-call doctor's instructions.  And I wanted to at least let him know that I had this issue.  He said if it happened again to go straight to the hospital to be monitored.  I wasn't sure if I could take this as a relief or instruction to be more cautious and aware.  

Yesterday, I went about my day, trying to ignore what didn't happen the day before.  I took the dogs for a walk, and Trey and I went to dinner with some friends.  When we got home, I tried to decipher if things were more "wet" than normal.  It could have seemed like more from sweat from my walk or more pee or more whatever.  I finally settled to just go to the ER and have them check me out, since that was my doctor said to do if I felt that it occurred again.  

After being admitted, putting on a gown, getting hooked up to a fetal monitor, and answering the bazillion questions required to be admitted as a patient.  They took a swab to test to see if what I was experience was my water leaking or something more embarrassing but less scary.  

I hung out in my labor and delivery room (somewhere I didn't expect to be for very long time) and watched Castle while I waited for the results.  It was getting really late at this point, and I started to feel silly for creating an ordeal for something that is probably all in my head.  The nurse came back and said, "Well, it's not amniotic fluid."  

So they let me go home with instructions to come back if I felt anything like that again and assurance that I did the right thing.  That helped, because I was feeling extremely embarrassed for spending two hours in the ER over the fact that I simply peed myself.