If you haven't seen the movie Steel Magnolias, I'm about to ruin the plot for you. So if you want, scroll past this paragraph, and I'll continue with my regularly scheduled blogging. Basically, a type 1 diabetic woman dies from being pregnant and having a kid. Everyone is sad. The End.
Well, I had my first "Steel Magnolias" experience the other week when my parents were visiting. Someone who worked with my mom asked her if the reason Trey and I don't have kids (yet) is because I'm diabetic. My mom quickly rebutted that reason and said that I am perfectly able and capable of having kids on my own. And that our reasons for waiting were ours alone and had nothing to do with diabetes. (Go Mom!)
Yes, it's true that Trey and I are waiting, but not on diabetes. My last A1c got the "green light" from my endo, and I'm aiming to get even lower. But more importantly, I'm reading more and more stories everyday of type 1 moms having healthy babies. The stories are so, so encouraging, but they still fade in the light compared to Steel Magnolias. I really think someone should make a Steel Magnolias 2, where Shelby's granddaughter who has type 1 has like 1,000 healthy babies with her insulin pump and CGM.
But the point of this post is to say that I have every hope and intention of having kids one day, and not dying in the process. I have no fear of the pregnancy process because I have researched and googled everything that's going to happen from preconception to birth to breastfeeding. Those things, I can prepare for.
What I can't prepare for is someone seeing me all round-bellied, sporting an insulin pump, and thinking that I'm basically committing suicide by having kids. I'm really not very patient when it comes to other people's ignorance. Does anyone have that book, you know, "What to Expect When You're Expecting Comments from Ignorant People about Your Type 1 Diabetic Pregnancy"? Because I sure could use a copy about now. I'm pretty sure those comments can bounce off of me like steel, but I'm not sure I can respond sweetly and in kind like a magnolia. I can handle a type 1 diabetic pregnancy, I can handle the hundreds of doctor's appointments leading up to birth, and I can even handle all that while being called "Shamu". But I can't, CAN.NOT handle other people telling me it can't be done.
Perhaps is the southern woman stubborn part of me, but nothing makes me want to do something more than other people telling me that I can't.
Of course, I still have some diabetic goals before getting pregnant, like achieving a perfect baby-building A1c like this here chica. =)
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About Me
- Holly
- My name is Holly and I live in north Alabama with my hubby, two cats, and a dog.
What people believe to be their business -- especially when it comes to the reproductive lives of people they don't know -- is astonishing.
ReplyDeleteI, for one, am waiting on diabetes -- and a slew of other health issues -- and if one more person asks me when I'm going to have kids or why I don't have any, I might start telling people that I've had a hysterectomy. It's easier than going into all the other details.
Side note: a friend of mine is 7 months pregnant and bought some wine for a friend's birthday gift at Target a few weeks ago. The checkout lady refused to sell it to her unless my friend swore it wasn't for her own consumption.
We tend to hear more about the bad things that happen with diabetes and pregnancy because it makes for a tantalizing story. However, the reality is it is quite common, and both mother and the children from these pregnancies are frequently very healthy -- too bad that didn't make headlines even though its becoming quite common!
ReplyDeleteI honestly have never seen the famed "Steel Magnolias"...and I'm not really sure that I want to. I know that living and coping with Diabetes is so much better then when that movie was made, but it is sometimes hard for me to remember that when I watch something so "close to home." I think its great that you are waiting for the right time on a Trey and Holly timeline, not on the Diabetes timeline! You go girl, and I can't wait to hear your story every step of the way!!
ReplyDeleteAs a pregnant diabetic woman, I can tell you those comments from other people can drive you crazy. I used to be a somewhat normal person prior to pregnancy, but once those hormones kicked in, watch out! :) You most definitely won't be able to respond in kind all the time. :)
ReplyDeleteHi Holly,
ReplyDeleteI know this post is old, but here I got with my reading after started to read your blog last night and reading it to the early hours and part of tonight.
I have to agree with Jacquie above: people tend to feel they know what's best for you and when. I'm waiting on my diabetes' timeline and also on my and my hubby's timeline and I know that these timelines will align. I have a lot of young mothers and mothers-to-be in my circle and I admit this was kind of a wake-up call for me: we always wanted kids but I didn't start preparing for it diabetes-wise until recently.
Some choices are ours and some of the power is in our hands, but the rest is God's will. We are all doing the best we can to have healthy babies while staying healthy.